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Thursday, October 6, 2011

What makes a good marriage according to the bible?

Proverbs 18:22     
He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord
(Ok, a man needs to find his own wife and doing this is a good thing)

Proverbs 19:14     
House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.
(So, even though a man needs to find his own wife, god will provide a prudent wife to just some people. Obviously, not all wife's are prudent)

Eph. 5:23-32
For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church; he gave his life to be her Savior. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives must submit to your husbands in everything.
And you husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by baptism and God's word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man is actually loving himself when he loves his wife. No one hates his own body but lovingly cares for it, just as Christ cares for his body, which is the church. And we are his body.
As the Scriptures say, "A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one." This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.
(So, the man is in charge, but it is a mystery how they become one flesh. I think it has to do with the begetting part of the bible)

Romans 7:1-3
Or do you not know, brothers—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law is binding on a person only as long as he lives? For a married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies she is released from the law of marriage. Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law, and if she marries another man she is not an adulteress.
(It is ok for a widow to marry another. But as we will see later, that will be a problem, since a man should only marry a virgin)

1 Peter 3:1-5, 7
Likewise, you wives should be subordinate to your husbands so that, even if some disobey the word, they may be won over without a word by their wives' conduct when they observe your reverent and chaste behavior.

Your adornment should not be an external one: braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or dressing in fine clothes, but rather the hidden character of the heart, expressed in the imperishable beauty of a gentle and calm disposition, which is precious in the sight of God. For this is also how the holy women who hoped in God once used to adorn themselves and were subordinate to their husbands;

Likewise, you husbands should live with your wives in understanding, showing honor to the weaker female sex, since we are joint heirs of the gift of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
(Men are in charge, even if they are unbelievers)

1 Corinthians 7:12-15
To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.
(Having a spouse who does not believe will not effect the children. Good to know)

2 Corinthians 6:14     

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?
(However, one should never be with an unbeliever)

1 Corinthians 7:1-40     

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
(Actually, men should not have sex at all. But since they have no self control, they should at least be married)

1 Corinthians 7:24-40     
So, brothers, in whatever condition each was called, there let him remain with God. Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. ...
(Once again, men should not be married. But if they have already gotten married, they will need to suffer through it)

1 Corinthians 13:1-13     
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ...
(But if you do not find love, you will not have it all)

Proverbs 21:9     
It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife.
(Check, stay away from fussy women. But what if the quarrelsome wife is prudent? Would she still be a gift from god)

Proverbs 21:19     
It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman.
(There are some spouses that a person cannot live with even in the corner of the housetop. You need to get as far away as possible. But do not divorce them, of course.)

1 Corinthians 6:16     
Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.”
(If you marry a prostitute, you still become one flesh. I would think there would be a lot more flesh in that marriage equation, but I digress)

Leviticus 21:7     
They shall not marry a prostitute or a woman who has been defiled, neither shall they marry a woman divorced from her husband, for the priest is holy to his God.
(But, one should not marry a prostitute, or someone who has been raped, or someone divorced. Check)

Matthew 19:2-9     
And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there. And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” ...
(Ok, no divorces allowed)

Matthew 5:32     
But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
(Well, except if that woman is sleeping around. Afterall, there has to some guidelines. Fair is fair.)

Leviticus 20:14     
If a man takes a woman and her mother also, it is depravity; he and they shall be burned with fire, that there may be no depravity among you.
(Ok, no threesomes with a mother and daughter. Did that really need to be commanded?????)


Leviticus 21:13-15     
And he shall take a wife in her virginity. A widow, or a divorced woman, or a woman who has been defiled, or a prostitute, these he shall not marry. But he shall take as his wife a virgin of his own people, that he may not profane his offspring among his people, for I am the Lord who sanctifies him.”
(A wife must be a virgin and from his own people)

1 Timothy 5:14     
So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander.
(Whom are these widows getting married to since a man should only marry a virgin?)

 Genesis 20:9-16     
Then Abimelech called Abraham and said to him, “What have you done to us? And how have I sinned against you, that you have brought on me and my kingdom a great sin? You have done to me things that ought not to be done.” And Abimelech said to Abraham, “What did you see, that you did this thing?” Abraham said, “I did it because I thought, There is no fear of God at all in this place, and they will kill me because of my wife. Besides, she is indeed my sister, the daughter of my father though not the daughter of my mother, and she became my wife. And when God caused me to wander from my father's house, I said to her, ‘This is the kindness you must do me: at every place to which we come, say of me, He is my brother.’” ...    
(Marrying one's sister is ok?) 

 Luke 20:28     
And they asked him a question, saying, “Teacher, Moses wrote for us that if a man's brother dies, having a wife but no children, the man must take the widow and raise up offspring for his brother.
(So, if he has his own children, the widow and her children are on their own)

Mark 12:19-23     

“Teacher, Moses wrote for us that if a man's brother dies and leaves a wife, but leaves no child, the man must take the widow and raise up offspring for his brother. There were seven brothers; the first took a wife, and when he died left no offspring. And the second took her, and died, leaving no offspring. And the third likewise. And the seven left no offspring. Last of all the woman also died. In the resurrection, when they rise again, whose wife will she be? For the seven had her as wife.”
(How would you like to be brother number seven in this love story?)

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